Shopping Product Reviews

Influence: parenting and grandparents

We had three graduations in our family this year, so spring was busy!

Andrew turned eighteen in May and graduated from twelfth grade in June. I was surprised to see everything that happened to prepare him for the ceremonies and celebrations. His brother gave him a suit to wear. His father took him shopping for a belt and shoes. Her mother ordered the corsage for her escort, and an hour before we left, she was ironing her shirt to be freshly ironed.

Thinking that this might be an opportunity to provide a little practical direction, I suggested that I could teach Andrew how to iron the shirt himself. With a big smile he said “Okay, Grandma. She likes to do this for me.” I thought I would go a step further and asked “What will happen if you live alone and you don’t know how to iron a shirt?” He gave me a look that hinted that he just didn’t understand life and delivered a very simple answer: “YouTube!”

Things are very different now from the days when I was raised or even since I was raising my children. They can get information, instructions, and an unlimited supply of ideas from around the world in seconds. But there are some things they cannot achieve without the influence of family.

Andrew was on his way to pick up the corsage and I offered to go with him. He seemed surprised that I was interested in joining him, but I knew that even a few minutes of driving would give me a chance to talk about things I hoped he would consider. We talked about the fact that you are now of legal age and therefore you would need to make decisions that you had not faced weeks before, such as long-term career planning, pensions and health care. You asked good questions and I was able to talk about how some types of investments would lower your income tax requirements.

When we left a store, Andrew turned to me and said, “You are such a nice lady.” I asked him how he came to that conclusion and he said, “You made that business owner’s day.” He had noticed that it had taken me a couple of minutes to talk to the man about his culture and shop. When we walked out of the next store, Andrew said “You almost got that guy crying.” I asked the clerk if he and his grandmother had ever shopped together and they told me that his grandmother had died when he was a baby. Fortunately, I was able to restore the positive mood by asking her if she had any kind aunts.

Well, when we got back to the house, Andrew enthusiastically told his mother that we had a good conversation about RSVPs. To close. It was RSP, Andrew!

Over the years, I have come to the conclusion that there are only two things that we, as parents and grandparents, can do that will significantly help future generations. We can pray for them and be a good example for them.

Giving them money without wisdom is useless. Giving them advice that we don’t model is hypocritical. Taking on their responsibilities instead of letting them do things for themselves will prevent them from maturing.

Our role is unique. We make a difference when we provide practical and spiritual support.

For everything else, there’s YouTube!

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