What every parent of youth athletes should know

So Junior is ready to start playing a sport. The expectations are clear, everyone is excited and it’s Game On. In order for the season to be a success for everyone, the following points must be strictly adhered to:

Cheer on your team, not the other team. No parent wants their child to be yelled at in the stands by another parent for “cheating,” “lane camping,” or any derogatory comment describing the violation. Sports are about learning for all players, and hopefully the child with the “cheap shot” will be corrected by the child’s coach or parent. That’s not your job. They most likely know it was a poor choice and don’t need the humiliation of viewers pointing out their mistake. Focus on your child, applaud the positives and leave the negatives alone.

Don’t train from the sideline. That is the coach’s job. Coaches have set up practices, run drills, set up plays, and put together lineups for a reason: so they can implement them during a game. Don’t frustrate his son by calling his own game. If you think he can do a better job than the coach, your association will most likely ask for more volunteers next year; be sure to raise your hand then.

Wait 24 hours to talk to the coach. Emotions often run high in game situations and you won’t always agree with the way the coach handles games, but waiting to discuss a topic until the next day will allow the adrenaline to wear off and the nerves to relax. Yelling at the coach after the game for a bad play: bad. Maturely discussing your frustration by addressing specific points via email or phone call in a calm, non-accusatory tone: Good. Hindsight is always 20/20 and the coach is usually very aware of a bad play. Your child may also have a very different perspective on an incident that left you angry, and it’s always a good idea to remind yourself that it’s about them, not you. If your player feels that he was treated unfairly, encourage him to discuss it with the coach. This is a great way for them to gain valuable communication skills by speaking with authority figures in a respectful and constructive way, and it provides a fantastic opportunity for the child to take care of their own business.

Encourage effort, not results. Success will never be measured by the counts in the “win” column. Making the effort to master a skill requires patience and determination. When the effort is there, the results will eventually follow.

Be nice to the other parents. You already have a common interest in getting your kids involved in the same sport and you are in the same boat when it comes to cost, time, and emotional investment. They are likely to become your allies, your support, your social outlet, your informant, and your shared ride. If Junior likes the sport and wants to keep playing, he’s likely to see a lot of these people in the future, so it’s good to start off on the right foot.