Why Divorce Mediation Costs Less

Divorce is expensive and the resulting fallout can devastate a family for a long period of time. Mediation minimizes this expense and the ongoing aftershocks of the initial destruction.

Some of the costs associated with divorce are:

o Attorney fees/mediator fees

o Time lost from work/job loss/opportunity lost

o Stress/illness/psychological trauma

o Trauma for children

ATTORNEY FEES/MEDIATOR FEES

Divorces in which financial issues or children’s living arrangements are in dispute typically cost more than $25,000 per spouse. Cases involving complicated property division or support issues can exceed fifty thousand dollars per spouse. These cases can take two to three years to reach the courts.

In contrast, these same types of cases often have a combined total cost to both spouses of less than ten thousand dollars in mediation and attorney fees when divorcing couples choose to go to mediation before pursuing court action. The time needed to finalize a mediated divorce is usually less than six months.

Mediated divorces typically cost less, although mediators’ hourly rate is often similar to the hourly rate attorneys charge. The cost is less because the time required for the mediator and the attorneys in a mediated divorce is substantially less than the time required for two separate attorneys to proceed with a divorce through the court system.

This is due in part to the fact that much time and money for attorneys’ fees is used during the initial stages of the divorce process to litigate secondary issues for the purpose of pretense and intimidation. Clients often find themselves going to court numerous times to litigate various issues that are of little consequence to the final outcome of their case.

For example, one spouse may request court intervention to order the other spouse to pay certain expenses, on a temporary basis, or to determine who is entitled to reside in the home during the divorce proceeding. These are often two highly controversial issues in which each of the opposing attorneys seeks to gain a psychological advantage over the other by “winning” a favorable decision early in the litigation.

Also, issues related to one party not filing required documents or answering certain questions can tie up a divorce case for two to three years. This rarely occurs during the mediation process because the agreement to mediate includes an agreement to provide all documents and information requested by the mediator. Refusal to do so will terminate the mediation.

Unfortunately, one of the most widely used tactics to litigate these temporary or peripheral matters is character assassination of the opposing spouse during court appearances. Once this begins, clients are willing to continue funding their attorneys to protect them from what they perceive to be a potentially devastating outcome.

Another factor leading to lengthy/expensive divorce litigation is the conflict of interest between the client and the attorney. Most attorneys require substantial advances (between five and ten thousand dollars) before starting a case, as well as replacement advances, as the case progresses. The attorney then charges an hourly rate that is credited against the retainer. If the attorney establishes the case, the attorney is required to return any unused portion of the retainer to the client. The longer it takes to resolve any divorce case, the more money the attorney makes.

Brokers generally operate under a different type of financial structure. They earn money by working with a larger number of clients for shorter periods of time. A good mediator earns a reputation for helping clients quickly reach resolution of their divorce issues. Some mediators will further limit clients’ financial exposure and fear of increased costs by charging a flat fee for preparing all the paperwork once clients have reached an agreement.

Once the paperwork has been completed, mediation clients are encouraged to take the divorce papers to separate “consulting” attorneys for review. These documents should include the divorce agreement, as well as all supporting financial materials, such as recent retirement account and bank statements, appraisals, mortgage balance statements, and tax returns.

The consulting attorney will usually charge only a couple of hours (not a substantial retainer) to review the divorce papers. The net result is less time spent by everyone and less money spent by the customer.

LOST TIME FROM WORK/LOSS OF JOB/LOSS OF OPPORTUNITY

The time commitment required to prepare for and attend court proceedings depletes available time, energy, and resources that could be used to improve each spouse’s job performance or pursuit of financial opportunities.

The stress of a litigated divorce can be so debilitating that litigating spouses are often unable to perform their jobs with even a minimal level of competence. As a result, it is not uncommon for people who are getting divorced to lose their jobs or experience business failures.

Mediation saves time, emotional energy, and financial resources, and allows spouses to move on without having to recover from the destructive side effects experienced during court proceedings.

STRESS/ILLNESS/PSYCHOLOGICAL TRAUMA

It is also not unusual for a person to become seriously ill while getting a divorce. The fear of the unknown, the psychological trauma that results from experiencing the other spouse’s behavior (both in and out of the courtroom), and the need to deal with parent-child relationship issues can be overwhelming.

Mediation brings financial and parenting issues to light so they can be addressed and resolved cooperatively. Although each spouse may not get the exact result he thinks he wants, he gets a resolve, and with that resolve comes the opportunity to move on and rebuild.

Nothing can be more difficult than encountering the unknown and experiencing the feeling of helplessness associated with the inability to navigate to the other side. Mediation provides the tools to get through a divorce without leaving devastation in its wake.

TRAUMA FOR CHILDREN

One of the strongest reasons to mediate is to protect your children. It’s hard enough for children to adjust to the reality that the family they trusted would continue to exist is falling apart. Children look to their parents for guidance and help in understanding what is going on in their home.

Children who experience parents treating each other with respect and also being able to remain available for their children and other responsibilities, even during a divorce, are more likely to model that behavior and perceive the world in a more positive way.

Mediation allows couples to maintain their integrity and continue to present themselves to their children as the kind of parents they would be proud to see their children become.