How to stay calm in the middle of a remodel
You have finally reached the point where you can no longer live with the inefficient kitchen or the unsightly bathroom or the worn out carpet in your house. He has decided to remodel and is excited about how it will look when he is done. It is an exciting time and it is also a challenging time. If he’s ever been through a remodeling project, he knows it will take time, time when things will be in a state of chaos. When there will be dust and dirt and ‘stuff’ everywhere. How can you stay calm, focused, and positive during the remodeling process, and more importantly, how can you ensure that the project is completed as quickly and efficiently (and seamlessly) as possible?
There is actually more to this energetically than you think. I have worked with many clients who started a remodeling project only to find that several years later, the project has not been completed and is tearing relationships apart.
The first thing to keep in mind is that your house represents you and your life. When you are remodeling some part of your home you are also creating a great energy shift in some area of your life. It’s important to be aware of this and watch for any challenges that come up in your life once you start the remodeling process because there’s bound to be a link. So with that in mind, here are some key steps based on my remodeling experience and my work with clients, to help you through the process:
have a clear vision – Know what you want the result to be. If you don’t have a clear idea of what you want your kitchen, bathroom or floors to look like, everything can take much longer. If you know exactly what you want before you start the project, things can go much better.
Keep everyone on the same page – make sure you and your spouse/partner agree on what will happen and how it will happen. When you’re in the middle of a remodeling project, it’s not the time to have a disagreement about what kind of countertops you want or what color the walls should be. Remember, turmoil in your home can mean turmoil in your relationship and if you haven’t come to an agreement before you start, you may never come to an agreement and resentment can build.
understand the chaos – before something can change and you achieve the desired result, you have to go through some discomfort. There will be chaos, but out of chaos comes growth and opportunity. There are two types of chaos: active chaos and passive chaos. Active chaos is when you are in the middle of a project, when you are creating something. For example, when you are baking a cake or cooking a meal, the kitchen looks chaotic for a while during the creative process. But that chaos is active. You are creating something. You have a goal in mind. Now, let’s say you finish your meal and don’t rinse. You leave pots and pans and ingredients on the counter. Let’s say those things sit there for days or weeks. That has turned into passive chaos. Nothing happens, and it’s not good.
So understand that there will be chaos during the process, but it is active chaos, which is necessary and good. Don’t let it become passive.
contain the chaoss – try to keep the chaos contained and organized as much as possible. So, if you are remodeling the bathroom, you can find some attractive containers to place all your toiletries so that you have easy access to them. Everything is organized and you know where to find it. Don’t let these things start moving around the house so they can take over other areas. Keep them in one place.
Maintain a safe space – It’s important, even if you’re remodeling the whole house at once, to have at least one space you can go to that’s quiet, peaceful, and organized. When the chaos becomes too much, this is a space you can retreat to, regroup, and restore a sense of calm.
Set clear expectations – Are you doing the remodeling yourself or is a company doing it for you? Either way, you want to have clear goals and expectations. Know when each phase of the remodel needs to be completed and hold everyone to it. If you find that things are slipping, you’ll need to address it right away and deal with whatever the problem is. I’ve worked with many people who have had companies get stuck in the middle of their project: they don’t show up when they should, they don’t get the job done right, etc., so projects persist over and over again with no sign of completion. If you have a clear agreement up front, if something doesn’t go as planned, you can address it right away.
manage overwhelmed – if you start to feel overwhelmed with the whole thing because it turns out to be bigger than you thought, make sure you take time to spend it in a quiet and calm space to calm feelings of overwhelm. Address issues that arise right away so they don’t become overwhelming. You may find it helpful to leave the space for a short time to revitalize and renew it. Perhaps you could book a weekend visit with a friend, or a day or two at a spa retreat. It’s important to treat yourself well during the process because it can quickly become overwhelming.
Focus on the result – keep your focus on how beautiful it will be when it’s finished, and don’t allow yourself to fully focus on the “active chaos” around you. Manage chaos as best you can, but know that it is an important and unavoidable part of the process. Maintain a sense of self-awareness at all times and know that you are stirring up energy in your home, which can stir up situations and relationships in your life, which is ultimately a good thing. Awareness is the key to handling it all successfully.
You often find that when you undertake a remodeling project you get much more out of the process than you ever thought you would. See everything as positive and it will be. Allow yourself to enjoy the process and do whatever it takes to take care of yourself the way you do. Happy remodeling!